S.B.D. (Silent Butt Deadly)
My family has their issues, but they can be absolutely hilarious at times. Unintentionally so.
Like two days before Christmas there was a ginormous ice storm in northwest Ohio. It was pretty bad. On top of that it would warm up enough so that during the day the snow on top of the ice would melt - and freeze over at night creating more ice.
So as a dutiful daughter and grandchildren we went over to my grandparents house to help them clean the ice off their driveway. They live in an old farm house. They used to farm when I was a little kid. So their house is set off of the street a bit and they have a pretty long driveway. I'm just glad it's paved now because when we were little it was all gravel. I don't think there is a way to clean ice off gravel. Ice it and wait for it to melt essentially.
So we went out with shovels, hoes (the old spikey ones worked really well - like an ice pick) and whatever else we could get to break up the ice a bit. Unfortunately they didn't have any salt in their garage and they weren't home. So we worked for like 30 minutes and realized there was no way we were going to get any further without salt; and it was Christmas day so no stores were open. My mom and younger brother went back to our house to go get some salt that my parents had.
They get back about 20 minutes later - we spread the salt - work for an additional 30 minutes or so and decide that there is nothing more we can do that day. So we put the tools back in the garage and make sure there's a lot of salt on the driveway - and head towards the car to go to my aunts house with plans to come back in an hour or so with fresh recruits.
So my mom, my younger brother and I pile into my mom's car. I'm the last one in and my mom is pulling away before I even have the door shut. As soon as I shut the door I notice a very distinct sent. " OMG Little Bro - Did you fart? That's aweful!"
Little Bro starts laughing. My mom says: "Matt farted on the way back to grandma's."
Are you kidding me? It was like 40 minutes later. This wasn't just a slight scent of something rank. This was full on S.B.D. ridiculous horrendous butt haneous. Horrible. We we rolled down the windows and it still wouldn't go away immediate. It has soaked into the fabric of the seats! We had to drive over a mile down the road in the freezing cold before the scent had disipated enough where we could stand to have the windows back up.
Little Bro is not allowed anywhere near my mom's cinnamon rolls again. It was epic.
Like two days before Christmas there was a ginormous ice storm in northwest Ohio. It was pretty bad. On top of that it would warm up enough so that during the day the snow on top of the ice would melt - and freeze over at night creating more ice.
So as a dutiful daughter and grandchildren we went over to my grandparents house to help them clean the ice off their driveway. They live in an old farm house. They used to farm when I was a little kid. So their house is set off of the street a bit and they have a pretty long driveway. I'm just glad it's paved now because when we were little it was all gravel. I don't think there is a way to clean ice off gravel. Ice it and wait for it to melt essentially.
So we went out with shovels, hoes (the old spikey ones worked really well - like an ice pick) and whatever else we could get to break up the ice a bit. Unfortunately they didn't have any salt in their garage and they weren't home. So we worked for like 30 minutes and realized there was no way we were going to get any further without salt; and it was Christmas day so no stores were open. My mom and younger brother went back to our house to go get some salt that my parents had.
They get back about 20 minutes later - we spread the salt - work for an additional 30 minutes or so and decide that there is nothing more we can do that day. So we put the tools back in the garage and make sure there's a lot of salt on the driveway - and head towards the car to go to my aunts house with plans to come back in an hour or so with fresh recruits.
So my mom, my younger brother and I pile into my mom's car. I'm the last one in and my mom is pulling away before I even have the door shut. As soon as I shut the door I notice a very distinct sent. " OMG Little Bro - Did you fart? That's aweful!"
Little Bro starts laughing. My mom says: "Matt farted on the way back to grandma's."
Are you kidding me? It was like 40 minutes later. This wasn't just a slight scent of something rank. This was full on S.B.D. ridiculous horrendous butt haneous. Horrible. We we rolled down the windows and it still wouldn't go away immediate. It has soaked into the fabric of the seats! We had to drive over a mile down the road in the freezing cold before the scent had disipated enough where we could stand to have the windows back up.
Little Bro is not allowed anywhere near my mom's cinnamon rolls again. It was epic.
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