Emotional Roller coaster

This week has been an awful awful emotional roller coaster. And not in any kind of good way. This is from going to being amazingly content with life to sad, normal to really sad, normal to super lonely, exhausted to sad, surprised to upset, lonely to sad, upset to angry, sympathetic to angry, angry to really sad, lonely to just feeling downright pathetic. I don't think I've cried this much in a week since I was 16 and having family issues. I guess it's a bit much at once. Vacation was really awesome, relaxing, fun, nice, chill, just ... good, just ... happy.

Coming back was a bit ridiculous. Work was difficult to concentrate on this week. Too much other stuff has overflowed this week. Life just leaves me as I am. Incredibly sad and lonely and by myself on a Friday night. It's not what I want, but I think what I really want is out of reach. I wish I could reach out and grab it - but not everything is in my control. I just want to be happy - and above that - what I want most of all - is that the people I love are happy. Sometimes those things just can't coincide.

That makes me even sadder.

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