Baby Finances

Here's an interesting perspective on why one person thinks you should vote for the democratic ticket. It is something to consider. Healthy well balanced relationship. I don't know if their relationship is better or worse than the McCain's - but they sure do communicate differently, and are much more open. I'm not sure if that is always a good thing or a bad thing, but it is definitely something to ponder. I think openness is better in most cases. Michelle seems genuinely interested in her husband and cheers him on. But it doesn't feel like she is doing is blindly; she offers advice to help Barrack improve; he seems to listen to her. It does seems like a model healthy relationship. I saw a couple of movies this weekend. The Dutchess with Kira Knightly, and Eagle Eye with Shia LaBoeuf. The dutchess was super depressing in a life doesn't always turn out okay; shit sucks and you have to deal with it. I felt sad after - and I was way buzzed during the ent...

What is more important? Getting what you want, or having the people that you love get what they want. For some reason the latter seems better. It doesn't feel better though.

Except not made up. Someone that gets my sense of humor. Misses me a whole lot after not spending 10 days together. Someone who puts my happiness above their own (on the big stuff - not what to have for dinner) - IE Jim encourages Pam to go to New York for three months. And finally, someone who loves me enough to drive an hour during the middle of the work day to come propose to me. If only TV relationships weren't made up :-(

I am going to get over this funk and get on with life. Shit happens, there's nothing I can do about it but roll with the punches. Getting depressed and upset about stuff that I can't change isn't going to help anyone - much less myself. I'm done with this. I'm going to get over it. By get over it - I'm not just going to ignore it - but work through it and get it done. Ignoring things never helped me before and it's not going to help me now. I can only work though it and just keep moving forward. I think that should be my motto in life. Keep moving forward. No matter what shit comes down, what shit hits the fan, what shit happens around me, and what shit I bring on myself. Keep moving forward. Making progress always makes me feel better. Making no progress just keeps the cycle of depression going. Therefore this is not going to be a wallow weekend culminating with a pity party. It's going to be a productive weekend, I'm going to get shit ...

I made caparsi salad last night with tomatoes from my garden! They were delicious - and the salad was super tasty. RedBones for dinner w/ Jess & Scott!!! Mmmm tasty BBQ. I love RedBones.

Life is way more complicated that I thought it could be. The real question is what is more important? Making you happy or making your loved ones happy? You can get padantic about it - what happens if you are super happy and they are only mildly happy but not super happy, or what happens if you are only moderately happy and they are miserable... but that's not the point. Who decides who gets what they really want? Why is what you really want always so complicated in life and you don't figure it out until it's too late to have it?

I totally made pie today. Mmmm apple pie... I love pie I'm making bacon pancakes for dinner. I'm sure I've raved about Bacon pancakes before. They're awesome. Like super amazing awesome. I actually did the proportions right this time (thank you for looking up Mom's Recepie.) They're going to be awesome. I love days of watching TV and cooking. Though I did burn my arm. Whatever.

This week has been an awful awful emotional roller coaster. And not in any kind of good way. This is from going to being amazingly content with life to sad, normal to really sad, normal to super lonely, exhausted to sad, surprised to upset, lonely to sad, upset to angry, sympathetic to angry, angry to really sad, lonely to just feeling downright pathetic. I don't think I've cried this much in a week since I was 16 and having family issues. I guess it's a bit much at once. Vacation was really awesome, relaxing, fun, nice, chill, just ... good, just ... happy. Coming back was a bit ridiculous. Work was difficult to concentrate on this week. Too much other stuff has overflowed this week. Life just leaves me as I am. Incredibly sad and lonely and by myself on a Friday night. It's not what I want, but I think what I really want is out of reach. I wish I could reach out and grab it - but not everything is in my control. I just want to be happy - and above that - w...

Everyone best be rememberin tha' Friarrrrday be Talk like yer a Pirate Day. Yarrrr be practicing tomorroer fer the pirate talk.

So over vacation we had a discussion about how much someone should tip. Essentially my tipping policy is that you start at 20% and are reduced by everything that you do wrong. If it takes 20 minutes to get your attention b/c you are too busy flirting with the bar keeper - or if you bug me every 10 seconds to take away my plate so that you can turn the table faster. Extremely rarely would I tip more - and only if the person was a complete RockStar and really entertaining. Typically entertaining me while I eat == bigger tip. Or earned % back for bad service. This generally results in a 15-20% tip. Though, if they are really bad - it can result in even less. Like if you screw up multiple times, or if you make a mistake, I ask for it corrected and then you argue about if it was really a mistake or not. I know that the kitchen didn't put asparagus in my pasta like they were supposed to, dumping watery non chopped up steamed asparagus on top after you put it in a take out conta...

I'm totally unmotivated today. It's not like it was a hard day. It was a normal day at work. I just am not in the mood to be there. I think that I'm mentally on vacation already. I love vacation. It's awesome. I did get a raise yesterday. The sad part of my past life is that my 3-month raise was higher that the combined total of my raises at my first job. Whatever. More money is great b/c it says that the company values me. But I don't care so much in terms of having more money. I have enough money to do what I want. It's nice to know that the company values me and my efforts. It's great too b/c I know other people have put in a lot more hours at the company and have gotten smaller raises. I think that is really just comes down to how they present their work and how effective their time is. I guess that I should finish packing and try to go grub up something to eat for dinner. I'm really not interested in packing tonight. Whatever.

Life in my 20's so far is nothing like I imaged in grade school or even high school. For some reason when you are that age you believe that once you are done with high school, or even university that you are going to have this great life with no problems. You can do whatever you want, buy whatever you want, be amazingly happy and get everything that you want out of life that your parents refuse to give you because your mom is a "mean mommy." (Yes, my little brother called my mom 'mean mommy' once when he didn't get his way. It was hilarious.) Fortunately, or unfortunately, it's not like that at all. I've learned so much about myself since I graduated university. I've been more introspective about who I am and what I'm really looking to try to get out of life. Maybe some people go through that at university, but I was way too busy studying and trying to graduate to be introspective. I bet if I went back and read my blog entries when I fi...

I am feeling super overwhelmed for no reason. Well, maybe there are reasons, but nothing much more than the normal. Maybe I'm at 70% stress max normally - so when extra stress piles on I'm quickly at 90-99%. I wouldn't call it complete freak out, just really anxious about not being at work for a week. Just really anxious actually. I'm not even sure if it's all about work. I'm slightly stressed about vacation - more because Kyle is stressed out than I actually am. We're smart people - we can always come up with solutions. Yet I still have the largest tension headache imaginable. So annoyed with life right now. This should be stressful, it's really not that stressful. I think my head is getting the better of me like normal. I think I should go make some cookies now.