Open Letter to Weird Lady at the Laundrymat:
Dear Weird Lady,
I totally understand that you forgot your dryer sheets. It was even easily forgivable that you couldn't remember their name "you know those things you put in the dryer so that your clothes aren't staticy." Forgiveable even that the dryer sheet's main purpose is not even to de-static your clothes -- but rather as a fabric softener. Non-the less it was all easily understandable.
When you asked me for a dryer sheet in your weird overdescriptive way -- I happily said "Here you go -- take as many as you need." You were very kind about it -- I went back to folding my clothes.
You then came up to me -- unexpectedly -- returning the used dryer sheet. I'm thinking "what the fuck? I don't want your trash." You said, "This one still has some wear to it -- I only used it for 8 minutes -- here you go -- for next time." I was a little stunned. That's like saying "I only wore this pair of panties for 8 minutes -- here you go -- you don't need to wash them before wearing -- because it was only 8 minutes." I beg to differ lady -- I don't really want your tained clothing smell to permeate my next load of wash. Nor am I so poor that I can't give up one dryer sheet out of 80. I was taken a back.
I just wanted to let you know though -- after I happilly accepted teh used dryer sheet back -- you then turned your back to fold your clothes -- I quickly snatched that nasty used dryer sheet off the table -- and tossed that thing into the garbage.
Just wanted to let you know -- you're weird lady.
Regards,
Me
I totally understand that you forgot your dryer sheets. It was even easily forgivable that you couldn't remember their name "you know those things you put in the dryer so that your clothes aren't staticy." Forgiveable even that the dryer sheet's main purpose is not even to de-static your clothes -- but rather as a fabric softener. Non-the less it was all easily understandable.
When you asked me for a dryer sheet in your weird overdescriptive way -- I happily said "Here you go -- take as many as you need." You were very kind about it -- I went back to folding my clothes.
You then came up to me -- unexpectedly -- returning the used dryer sheet. I'm thinking "what the fuck? I don't want your trash." You said, "This one still has some wear to it -- I only used it for 8 minutes -- here you go -- for next time." I was a little stunned. That's like saying "I only wore this pair of panties for 8 minutes -- here you go -- you don't need to wash them before wearing -- because it was only 8 minutes." I beg to differ lady -- I don't really want your tained clothing smell to permeate my next load of wash. Nor am I so poor that I can't give up one dryer sheet out of 80. I was taken a back.
I just wanted to let you know though -- after I happilly accepted teh used dryer sheet back -- you then turned your back to fold your clothes -- I quickly snatched that nasty used dryer sheet off the table -- and tossed that thing into the garbage.
Just wanted to let you know -- you're weird lady.
Regards,
Me
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